Monday 30 May 2016

Leave the Past in the Past

I did go to my favourite library and spent the day: struggling, fumbling and bumbling my side project forward. It was good because I could use their internet and electricity for free. 

I also find that going to a location like a library helps me get into “work mode,” so I get more done. All in all it was a very productive day. 

The only frustration was the fact that I had to park a few blocks away. Why? Well, first of all, the library itself hate me parking in their parking lot (it is small) and I understand that. 

The next natural place to park is in a remote area of one of the vast parking lots belonging to the shopping centre that the library is a part of (sorta). 

The trouble is that the security people of the shopping centre are a bit twitchy about me and want all kinds of personal information from me, just to park there . . . at all, let alone overnight. As a result I still haven’t talked to them, don’t park there and refuse to shop there (if it can be avoided).

I hold them no grudges as holding a grudge or hating will only impact me. Instead I find a way to get what I need done and leave others be; live and let live is a very wise life philosophy. 

I still can choose: what I do, who I support and who I don’t, I just avoid people and places out of protest, not hate.

I have been through a great deal of changes as I have gone through this great upheaval that this quest for debt freedom via this lifestyle has thrust upon me. 

In the process of it I have learned:

You need less material things to get by and be happy than you think.
Do not fear failure, but use it as a something to learn from.
Do not accept the constraints of others and society as absolutes.
It is not acceptable to be mired in lifelong debt.

And finally . . . 

You need to come to terms with, and make peace with, yourself and your past before you can let happiness in.
Leave the past in the past, just: reflect, understand and learn from it, but do not linger there.

These last two lessons have been the hardest to learn and put into practice. I have spent far too much time looking back on my life, feeling hard done by and yearning for choices not made or dreams and wishes unfulfilled. 

The past is the past and while each and every: interaction, relationship, hardship, obstacle, success, and failure that has transpired in your life has helped to shape you into the person that you are now. Even if you could go back in time and change what has happened, to do so would radically alter who you are now. 

All you can do, all any of us really can do is: 

1. Accept the fact that the past is a result of your choices and therefore your doing, 
2. Make peace with it
3. Learn from it
4. Move forward away from it. 

Your mind and efforts should be focussed on the future and the present, not the past. 

It has taken me a long time, 46 years as a matter of fact to learn that. I finally had a breakthrough this weekend and I feel at peace, truly at peace with everything for the first time in a very long time. I also, and in turn, feel happiness and contentment about my life and lifestyle.

Don’t get me wrong, I still am working to improve my life and situation and expect better and I am constantly working to improve my life and situation. 

I no longer feel a victim of: society, capitalism, consumerism, the universe or whatever else you could think up. This is a huge weight off of my shoulder and a truly life-altering realization to come to. 

With each day and each paycheque, I am inching myself forward towards my next fantastic day: 

Tuesday, January 16, 2018. 

For on that glorious morning I will wake up totally and completely debt free, and still own my home, as modest as it may be.

As always : Keep your head up, your attitude positive, and keep moving forward!

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